Archive for October 25th, 2009

Bewitched Bothered And Bewildered

Bewitched Bothered And Bewildered is inspired by Arsenio Hall’s Things That Make You Go Hmmm.

Some things in life just don’t make any sense when you just take the time to think about them. Case and point, jumbo shrimp. Really, that can’t make sense to anyone. I used to watch the Arsenio Hall show and I remember Bill Clinton playing the saxophone. So many late night hosts lost major ratings because of his show. I remember a few things that make you go hmmm and the rest I looked up on the Internet. You might have know some of your own. If so, I would love for you to share them with me. Thanks.

My favorite is first.

  • Why do we park in the driveway and drive on the parkway…
  • How come we treat people like dirt when they are alive and give them flowers after they die…
  • Do Lipton employees take coffee breaks…
  • Am I permitted to yell ‘movie’ in a crowded firehouse…
  • Why do they put Braille on the drive through bank machines…
  • Were the first 6 Ups a failure…
  • What would you do if the Hokey Pokey IS what it’s all about…
  • Why is it that bullets ricochet off of Superman’s chest, but he ducks when the gun is thrown at him…
  • Why do tourists go to the tops of tall buildings,  put money into telescopes so they can see things on the ground close-up…
  • Why do hot dogs come ten to a package and hot dog buns only have eight…
  • How does the guys who drive the snowplows get to work…
  • How do you throw away a garbage can…
  • If you’re in a vehicle traveling the speed of light, what happens when you turn on the lights…
  • What happens to an 18 hour bra after 18 hours…
  • Why is it that you must wait until night to call it a day…
  • Do you realize how many holes there could be if people would just take the time to take the dirt out of them…
  • How do they get the deer to cross at that yellow road sign…
  • Is the alphabet in that order because of the song…
  • If the #2 pencil is so popular, why is it still only #2…
  • If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting…
  • In what reality is it possible to have a civil war…
  • Did George Washington pull out a quarter when asked for I.D….
  • What did Preparation A through G do…
  • How do “Do not walk on the grass” signs get there…
  • Before they invented drawing boards, what did they go back to…
  • What hair color do they put on the driver’s licenses of bald men…
  • Can you be a closet claustrophobic…
  • If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent…
  • If crime doesn’t pay does that mean that my job is a crime…
  • Why does Hawaii have interstate highways…
  • If the pen is mightier than the sword, and a picture is worth a thousand words, how dangerous is a fax…
  • If I melt dry ice, can I take a bath without getting wet…

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