Archive for April 26th, 2012
Allowing another person to fully love me means I must…
I guess after yesterday’s answer I no longer feel that either of us ‘must’ be anything. It is perhaps the qualities that I would desire to have in a person or with this response, me. It isn’t a deal breaker because we really fall for friends and lovers with our hearts first and then with our minds. Rationality comes second in most cases because the heart is in full control at first and we all know the heart does, well, what the heart wants to do.
When someone tells you to follow your heart and depending on the situation I think you should do just the opposite. Following your heart makes great movies, makes terrific songs but in life experiences listening to your heart without using your brain will lead you down a path that you may wish you never walked.
We are talking about ‘love’. The biggest four letter word in the English language and the biggest how many letters in every other language. It might seem that the heart should lead in a decision related to love but most of the time we need to sit down with ourselves and think things through clearly and decisively.
Yes, I love that person but is that person capable of loving me the way I need to be loved for the rest of my life. Yes, I love that person but will the differences between us be beneficial of hindrances. Yes, I love that person but are their dreams and desires compatible with mine. Yes…. ad nauseum.
The qualities I want in a person I let in my life may not be there at the very moment we fall for each other but the potential may be there in them. More important, the potential for me to accept them and love them without having immediately fulfilled my laundry list of have and have nots is just as important to me. It’s about growth and longevity.